By Stormtrooper Eddie Hey, wait a second, hold on. Frank, what are you doing, man? What the hell was that? “You can go about your business? Move along?” You call that an interrogation?
By Raymond Hammet Let me ask everyone reading this a question: Where the hell do you get off? You all probably pay taxes, right?
By Chas Morris Yorzan Woo doggie, it’s been a while! Sorry I have not written in some time. So much has
By Maxwell Cross Hello, sir, madam. How are you both this evening? Have you decided on anything yet? Our specials today are — excuse me? No. I’m sorry, no. Yes, I get that all the time. Yes, I know I look a lot like him, but it’s just a coincidence. I assure you. Anyway, our [...]
By Chas Morris I’m having a really shitty day. I go to pick up my dry cleaning today and the stupid dry cleaners mis-pressed my brand new Hickey Freeman black striped super 120s wool 2-button suit. I tell the person that if I wanted my suit to be pressed like it were a 3-button, I [...]
By Chas Morris Whoever said ignorance is bliss is just wrong. They’re wrong because I should have said that first. Ignorance most certainly is not bliss, but one thing that is indisputably true is that my life would be a lot easier if I didn’t know that I was better than everyone else. It wasn’t [...]
Dude, These Totally Are the Droids We’re Looking For | 
I Can't Believe I Live in a City That Doesn't Condone Public Urination | 
Bless Mother Earth! Yowza! | 
What I Really Want to Do Is Wait Tables | 
Could My Life Be Any Worse? | 
It's Not Easy Knowing That You're Better Than Everyone Else | 
