Published: August 19, 2009
Man Comes Into Large Quantity of WineYoung man sitting on chair in corner of a room, holding bottle of champagne --- Image by © Neil Guegan/Corbis |
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By Aaron Kase WEST BRANCH, IA – Local man Dave Huggins came into a large quantity of wine last Friday and invited all his friends over to celebrate. “There was a big tasting at work,” Huggins said, referring to the Wallace Winery where he is a janitor
Published: August 6, 2009
"Cash for Clunkers" Program Infuses Billions, New Life into Foundering Health Industry |
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By David Sherrell WASHINGTON – The Obama Administration has recently unveiled what is fast becoming their most popular and lucrative stimulus program so far
Published: July 14, 2009
Decrease in Police Brutality Leads to Increase in Wussy Cops |
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By Jamie Vaughan BOSTON – A number of recently conducted studies indicate a worrisome trend affecting law enforcement agencies today.
Published: July 10, 2009
So '50s Chic: Segregation Alive and Well in the City of Brotherly Love! |
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(CNN) — A Philadelphia-area day care center said Thursday that members of a private swim club made racist comments about the center’s children, and the club then canceled their swimming privileges.
Published: July 1, 2009
Vince Young Demands Trade to University of Texas Longhorns |
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By Michael Catania NASHVILLE – Embattled and mercurial Tennessee Titans quarterback Vince Young, who recently demanded Titans management either install him as the team’s starting QB or trade him
Published: June 2, 2009
Africa Officially Declared a Country; Geographically-Challenged Americans Heave Sigh of Relief |
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By David Sherrell DUBUQUE, IA – In a move designed to alleviate increasing concerns over the average American student’s near-total ignorance of world geography, the U.S. Dept. of Education has issued a directive to U.S. teachers declaring the fabled land of Africa a “country.”
Published: June 1, 2009
Bless Mother Earth! Yowza! |
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By Chas Morris Yorzan Woo doggie, it’s been a while! Sorry I have not written in some time. So much has
Published: June 1, 2009
Dick Cheney to Star in New Talk Show |
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By Ami Manik Former Vice President Dick Cheney launched a new talk show, “Dicktates” on the Fox network, funded by a bailout for the failing non-liberal media. The show promises to show a sassier side of the former veep by airing various segments for the everyday real American, such as “How to Love Freedom” and [...]
Published: May 1, 2009
Ask Bobby Jindal |
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Dear Bobby Jindal, My roommate’s grooming habits are absolutely disgusting. I don’t know how he does it, but after waking up he goes from his bedroom to the bathroom to the kitchen and out the door, leaving a path of destruction in his wake-fingernail clippings, beard hairs, toothpaste globs, coffee spills, flecks of bread that [...]
Published: April 1, 2009
Ask the Director of Speed |
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Dear The Director of Speed, My boyfriend and I often argue about action movies. This weekend I want to see 12 Rounds but he wants to see the midnight showing of What the Bleep Do We Know? at the local indie theater. He’s working on his law degree, so when I suggested that we go [...]
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